Onward and Upward|焦慮的家長,累壞的學生

過去一週,一個剛參加了University Fair的學生,跟我分享她跟眾多大學招生代表聊天後,注意到的一個現象。

「我發覺越有名氣的大學,越鼓勵學生要在申請過程中展示自己的個性和所長。相反,那些沒名氣的大學代表,只說分數達標就可以成為他們的學生。」

我聽到學生這麼說感到很欣慰,因我之前給她的意見得到了第三方的驗證。她參加Univeristy Fair前我就一直督促她,選擇補習班和課外活動,要着重quality and not quantity,最好能完成一些與眾不同的項目,演示自己的獨特性,才能更引起大學錄取官的注意,學生年代的我就是用這種策略考入牛津。

遺憾的是,太多太多香港家長,給孩子的時間表排得滿滿,別人孩子補習彈鋼琴跳芭蕾練游泳,自己的孩子也要參加同樣活動。這些家長為甚麼不停下來想想,報讀那麼多班無非是為了孩子能考入好的大學,但如果優秀的大學更看重學生獨特性,自己孩子參加的課外活動又跟別人差不多, 怎樣脫穎而出?哪怕家長有無限的錢,孩子的精力是有限的,錢要用在刀刃上,精力也要耗在刀刃上。

我推薦焦慮的家長們讀讀Cal Newport的 How to Be a High School Superstar: A Revolutionary Plan to Get into College by Standing Out (Without Burning Out)。Newport自己是讀Ivy League出身,當年也是憑獨特的成就考進去,他書中採訪很多同樣憑獨特成就入讀名牌大學的學生。一位曾在Ivy League當過錄取官的人士這樣形容Newport的書:“Students will find his book extremely useful and admissions officers will be relieved to see applicants who escape the cookie-cutter syndrome.”

下面這個靠獨特性考入Columbia University的案例,來自Newport的Blog。我真的希望多一些家長能靜下心,報讀一大堆興趣班補習班前,先考慮孩子的天性和天賦,從現在到他/她考大學前的這些年月,培養一樣符合他/她個性的突出成就,這比逼他/她學十項半咸不淡的所謂talent,更能幫他/她成為dream university的學生。

 

Let’s try a simple experiment. Imagine that you’re an admissions officer at a competitive college, and you’re evaluating the following two applicants:

David — He is captain of the track team and took Japanese calligraphy lessons throughout high school;  he wrote his application essay on the challenge of leading the track team to the division championship meet.

Steve — He does marketing for a sustainability-focused NGO; he wrote his application essay about lobbying delegates at the UN climate change conference in Johannesburg, South Africa.

Who impresses you more?

For most people, there’s little debate: Steve is the star.

But here’s the crucial follow-up question: Why is Steve more impressive than David?

The answer seems obvious, but as you’ll soon discover, the closer you look, the more hazy it becomes. To really understand Steve’s appeal, we will delve into the recesses of human psychology and discover a subtle but devastatingly power effect that will change your understanding of what it takes to stand out.

Steve’s Story

Steve is a real student, one of the many I profile in my new book on students who get into good colleges while still enjoying their high school lives.  He currently attends Columbia University, which he describes as: “a school I would have never gotten into without my UN work.”

Here’s how his story unfolded…

As a high school sophomore, Steve stumbled into an opportunity to attend a UN conference in New York City, near where he lived. A believer in underscheduling, he had been “e-mailing every non-profit under the soon, looking for an unpaid internship.” Most organizations ignored him. One wrote back, however, and said they didn’t have a job for Steve, but they did have a slot for a student to accompany their delegation to an upcoming UN conference on children’s rights.

Steve jumped at the opportunity. He met delegates and learned about related NGOs. He even spoke up in a sub-committee meeting. This led to an invitation to attend an upcoming conference. And then another. In a short span, Steve became a UN insider.

“I loved it,” he recalls.

It was with this experience under his belt that, one year leader, Steve found himself in a conversation with a college student at a model congress conference.

“What sorts of things are you working on?”, she asked.

Steve mentioned the UN.

“The UN?”, she replied, “I work with them.”

As they continued to talk, the young woman revealed that she was involved with a non-profit called SustainUS — a group dedicated to helping American youth advocate for climate issues. SustainUS, at the time, had little money and no office — the employees were volunteers who worked virtually, mainly from college dorm rooms, organizing with Yahoo Groups and free web-based conference calls.

Steve proposed that he help the non-profit gain press coverage for their activism. “I like speaking with people, and I like writing, so that was a natural thing for me to work on,” he recalls. The group agreed.

“At 16, I was younger than the other members,” Steve told me. “But technology masked that.”

Over the next year, Steve called and e-mailed reporters, eventually scoring a few big hits, including a mention in Time Magazine’s Green Issue and a write-up in the Associated Press. As a reward for these efforts, the organization told Steve he could join the team traveling to the UN climate conference in Johannesburg to present a petition signed by American youth.

This was the experience Steve emphasized in his head-turning application essay.

 

Michelle Ng

英國牛津大學畢業,前《蘋果日報》和《眾新聞》專欄作家,現在身在楓葉國,心繫中國大陸和香港。
聯絡方式: michelleng.coach@proton.me
個人網站: https://michellengwritings.com


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